Where do you stand in my heart? I want to love you wholeheartedly again, but a part of me is just so scared, so timid of giving it out all once again. Please teach me how to love again.
love, cy
Thursday, September 20, 2007
I'm going to grow up and become...
WAHHH! MIRIAM!!!
love, cy
Thursday, September 13, 2007
20
Today I'm born into the world as a midnight child, the child of the late 80s now beginning her life in her 20s (ha! i know, too much of Midnight's Children). Maybe coz of the heavy workload i'm handling now, surprisingly, i find today will be an ordinary day. But Eightie assured me life will be better, no matter how pessimistic adulthood seems to be. Eightie touched on the dream of children-that they wish to sprout and be an adult as fast as possible. For freedom. I asked, really will have more freedom meh? Eightie's reply was, to a certain extent. If he answered yes or no, i wouldn't have been delighted. When yes and no weren't the answers, i felt good.
Today will be an ordinary day, but also a special one because i will keep everything safe in my hands. And I know whether today's my birthday or not, somewhere out there someone will be watching and protecting me. It's safe and peaceful today, and i'm glad im enjoying every bit of this gift now.
For my close ones who wish me a smooth year ahead and a happy birthday, this is a little something i'd like to share with you guys, esp ppl who are turning 20, 21 or are already in their 20s. Thank you for the well wishes!!!
Adapted from: Selected and Introduced by Haruki Murakami-Birthday Stories
"Have A Good Time" Yesterday it was my birthday. I hung one more year on the line. I should be depressed. My life's a mess. But I'm having a good time.
I've been loving and loving and loving. I'm exhausted from loving so well I should go to bed. But a voice in my head says, "Ah, what the hell."
Paul Simon
Happy Birthday. (:
love, cy
Monday, September 03, 2007
Rocks & You
Things don't get easy for you. You're not rich, you don't have a good and stable family and you wonder sometimes if you've been educated enough.
You don't live in a big house and sometimes you ponder if your parents have really brought you up the best way in life-elegance, etiquette and excellence.
You worry. When trouble hits, you challenge yourself to withstand your fears. But you're afraid. Afraid you cannot run through these obstacles in life. And you break down. Once. And you stand up strong again. Until another problem shoots you. And you drop down again; a bird with broken wings.
You know you want to be a good family member, a good partner, land up in a good occupation, have a good relationship, be a good parent, a grandparent. But you know you haven't got that far.
You're at the crossroads. You are past the age of a teenager, but not yet an adult. Sometimes you just want to be a child. Thinking if life could start all over again; you wailing in that pram.
You zap yourself back into reality. Of course not. Remember, things don't get easy for you. You might not have the elegance, the etiquette nor the excellence, but you had all the fun being rough and rugged. Which is better?
Your parents might not have brought you up the best possible way, but if they had, will they produce an ignorant and pampered child? Will they leave some mistakes behind for you to mend and cover up as a future parent? Which is better taught? A perfect family, or an imperfect one?
You stumble over rocks for reasons. You understand when things are going all good, you suddenly fall down again and again. Things don't get easy for you.
